The Gift of Presence
Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there – fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge – they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find that love actually is all around. - CURTIS, R., et al. (2004). Love actually.
It isn't a traditional Christmas movie but Love actually is one of my husband’s favorites and we watch it together every year. I've watched it at least half a dozen times but last night I felt like I was seeing it for the first time. My phone and laptop were out of reach, and I didn’t multitask and wrap gifts or make my grocery list.
I love Christmas. The gatherings, decorations, traditions, cooking, hosting, eating, celebrating, I look forward to it all year long and I'm genuinely sad when it's over. I love it so much that I try to make every year better than the last. The perfect tree, perfect decorations, perfect sugar cookies, perfect Christmas morning cinnamon rolls, perfect appetizers, dinner and desserts, a dose of charity to help those less fortunate, the perfect Christmas card and epic gifts that are just the right combination of practical, fun and extravagance that show you listened and paid attention and make the recipient feel loved and appreciated. It is all consuming from the beginning of November through Christmas day. As I watched that movie and truly saw it for the first time, it hit me that I've been doing things all wrong. I check everything off my list, but my quest for perfection means that when I'm baking cookies, my mind is already on the next task to be completed. Even when I'm sitting down 'relaxing' watching a Christmas movie, I'm distracted either by my phone, or computer, or stuffing Christmas cards and wrapping gifts. The result is like a beautifully wrapped empty box. What good is the perfect gift if you aren't fully present to give or receive it? I hope this holiday season brings you peace and joy and the gift of presence with the ones you love.